Now this weekend is dedicated to all about Madisyn and we are going to head out the door again soon, but I had to take a minute and post. See my little girl starts school tomorrow and it makes me want to cry which I am sure I will tomorrow even though she just goes three hours a day everyday, but still that's my little girl!
Last night we went to eat as a family and we are sitting there just chatting and coloring until our food comes. All of a sudden Madisyn pops up with "Mommy how do people die?" Ok after I pick up my jaw from off the table, I studder a little bit and umm yea umm daddy do you want to answer that for Madisyn?
But first Madisyn says mommy I know people die because I saw it on the news you were watching. My heart sank. I am not much of a tv watcher, but lately I have been glued to CNN because of the Miners in Utah. My heart just really aches for them. Well I was watching it when breaking news came in about three miners were killed in a collapse in the mine during resuce efforts. Guess who was sitting right beside me? Madisyn :(. I really did not realize the effect it put on her and I am going to have to pay more attention to what I am watching when she is in the living room.
"The Man" explains that death can happen a number of ways and he goes in about how different accidents happen. I pipe in and say and when someone dies they will go to Heaven while God will be there waiting with open arms to take you too his palace of Heaven. She took it pretty well and didn't really ask any more questions, but I can't help but wonder if I explained it good enough for her.
I know she is at the age to start asking questions now, but boy oh boy I didn't realize I would get these types of questions yet. If you have older kids, how have you explained this with your children?
I'll be back to read your questions tonight as we are out for a family day to do what Madisyn wants to do hehe.
casual friday everyday says
It’s amazing what they really absorb from TV and the people around them.
I would imagine for her age you all gave her all that she needed to know. I would imagine going into more detail or being more blunt about it could scare her even more.
So, good job. 🙂
She is growing up…fast. HUGS for tomorrow. Take lots of pictures through those mama tears.
Nell
Heather @ Desperately Seeking Sanity says
I don’t sugar coat it… but the best explaination that I have (and that I fully believe) is that when you’ve fulfilled your purpose on earth (The one the He has for you) He calls you home… sometimes we don’t know what that purpose is and often, we’ll never know… but I know, and have explained to my kids, that when people die, it’s because God wants us home with Him…
it’s the biggest reason I’m not afraid to die…
but it’s still a tough subject….
Deb - Mom of 3 Girls says
We went through the same thing with Abby a couple of years ago. It was around Easter and I think she somehow got confused between hearing about Jesus dying on the cross and who knows what else because she started asking me how people die and then before I could answer, she said, “I know – they either melt (???) or are squished by cars. Except for Jesus because he died on the cross.” After I picked up my jaw from the floor, we had a conversation about death and heaven and I tried to give her information without scaring her – it’s a hard subject to explain to kids! She asked about it several times for a few weeks and that was pretty much it. I’m still not sure where the ‘melting’ or ‘being squished by cars’ part came from though. Hannah hasn’t asked yet – I don’t know if that’s because she was there when we were talking to Abby or she just hasn’t gotten curious about it yet. We had a kitten who died over the winter and we went through the whole range of questions about where she went when she died then too.
I’m still not sure I feel like I explained it well enough to them. I was trying to find a book at the library to help but there wasn’t much there. Our neighbor has a good one that she let us borrow when the kitten died – I’ve got to find out what it was called so I can get a copy of it for us.
It’s one of those subjects that you hope your kids won’t have to deal with for a long, long time but you also want them prepared in case they do… So tough!
Carrie says
Jen, this has nothing to do with your post but I really like this new blog design. I couldn’t read that pale text on your last design so I would skip a lot. 🙁
This is much better and I’m back to reading!
mommyzing says
I don’t have any advice because my daugther is only 21 months, but I already think about things like these. They grow up so fast and I know I won’t have all the answers, but I hope I can teach her things and explain things as well as possible. I will be checking back to educate myself on this too! Thanks!
Jenn says
Well my daughter is now 8 and I think you handled it just right. With Aubrey she usually just wants a “little” and will ask for more if she needs/wants it. Kinda like with dinner! *Smile*
It’s hard today with the tv and all, but even with out it, there’s friends, things they hear on the radio, and things they just pick up while walking around in the mall….
I remember when Aubrey was younger she asked me “Mommy, why do boys have to show me there butts every time we go to the mall…” Now that’s not a “hard” question persay, but geeze I was sorta lost since I DONT EVEN KNOW! LOL
Fruit Heights UT says
I always thought Church helped my children understand death. It made more sense of it than I ever could.