I’m so bummed and I can’t quit thinking about the what-ifs :(. Tonight we took our nightly walk like we do every night, but this night I decided to do something different. I was missing my super fab friend Cindy and called her up to see if we could walk down to her house. She said sure, so we went on down. Plus you know hubbs is out of town and I don’t really get to much adult interaction these days LOL.
Anywho, instead of the girls doing the ole boring walk, we thought we would liven it up a little bit and let them ride their bikes. Who cares about the steep hill we would be going down and then back up, who cares about the dark tunnel we have to walk through. Yep :(. Here goes the mommy’s world’s worst mom moment. I am trying to make sure Lyndsee doesn’t go too fast down the hill, but in the mean time Madisyn doesn’t realize how fast she would be going down and just totally froze and didn’t use her breaks. She starts going so fast, and I am running at the same time yelling Madisyn Madisyn Madisyn…. there she goes down into the ditch and shoots across her handle bars and lands face first into a bunch of weeds in the grass. UGGGGH. I immediately jump down into the ditch to get her. She looks up at me with these big crocodile tears and says “Mommy I didn’t mean to”. Oh no Madisyn sweetie it isn’t your fault at all. Mommy should have warned you more and been there to hold and guide you. Mommy is sooooo sorry. We are just standing there hugging. What if she would have landed on her head?, What if she broke a bone?, What if she would have got seriously injured? She only ended up with 4 scratches on her leg we seen tonight while giving her a bath, THANK GOD who was watching over her! I’m so darn stupid, why did I not hold my daughter?… why did I let her go down that hill by herself?…Please forgive me Madisyn.
Mommy loves you with all her heart and I would never intentionally let anything happen to you in the world. I’m you’re protector and suppose to be there every step of the way.
I’m hanging my head in shame tonight :(.
Deb - Mom of 3 Girls says
Oh Jen… I’m sure she knows that you would never let anything happen to her on purpose. It was just an accident – and we all have those. All of the ‘what if’s can drive you crazy if you let them. Just try to relax and hug that little girl tight! 🙂
Deb – Mom of 3 Girls’s last blog post..This is why I wish my kids had summer birthdays.
Kelsey says
Oh Bless your heart!! We all make mistakes be glad she is safe! God is so good to us!
Kelsey’s last blog post..::Birthcontrol Is For People With Ugly Kids::
Cindy says
Oh Jen…
It’s not your fault nor is it Madisyn’s. I think that is part of learning to ride a bike. It seems like everyone has to have one of those big crashes. I still remember mine. 😉
Thank God that he was watching over her, I know that it could have been much worse.
If it don’t rain, I will see you this afternoon for a walk!
casual friday everyday says
I’m sure I would feel just as bad even though mistakes happen all of the time. Does she wear a helmet? I have one for Nicky that he wears when he’s on his bike. I’m sorry you both had a bad night!
casual friday everyday’s last blog post..In Touch With My Body
Andrea says
Oh…it’s totally not your fault!!! We all have these worst mommy moments…I’ve had my share – and yep, you do feel really awful after something like this happens…buuut at the same time, we’re not perfect either. 🙁 At least we can learn from our mistake though. 🙂
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Mozi Esme's Mommy says
Oh – I feel for you! There are so many times I think of what could have happened and am just so grateful it didn’t – and then I try never to let that situation happen again.
Like just the other night we were out with our stupid (affectionately called) big Rottweiler dog – I generally trust him around the baby, but we had new bunnies around and he was going crazy salivating after them. And I realized he was way too much for me to handle if he should decide to get aggressive with us. I beat myself up for putting my baby in this situation.
So don’t be like me and beat yourself up. You’re a great mother!
Mozi Esme’s Mommy’s last blog post..Thursday 13 – Growin’ Up in Mozambique
kailani says
You didn’t do it on purpose and sometimes things like this happen even to the most careful Mommies. You have nothing to be ashamed about.
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Peanut Butter and Jelly Boats says
So glad she’s ok. Dont’ beat yourself up over it. She’ll have many more bike scrapes in the future leaving this one forgotten.
Peanut Butter and Jelly Boats’s last blog post..He Knows Me So Well